An invitation of self reflection.
Definition of tradition
4: characteristic manner, method, or stylein the best liberal tradition
4: characteristic manner, method, or stylein the best liberal tradition
This year 2019 holds such a deeper thread of Mystery/Mastery Simplicity. There is truly a more embodied lived actualization of Spirit as Form ~ I feel I grasp the concept, We are the ones we have been waiting for. I feel more ready than ever to let myself be nourished and to live in joy.
2018 broke my heart and dragged me through rock and mud and destroyed my dreams and I almost lost faith – The paradox was so rich, My pain so lovingly sat side by side with joy and openings – My tears became laughter, then more tears and my heart will never be the same! Resilience is one of the sacred gifts I have been cultivating this lifetime, I am slowly coming through and gestating new dreams and when its time I know I will be a good Mother to them… And give them fully to the world.
Written January 2nd, 2019
Rites Of Passage ~ Mother to be ceremony
Ceremonial blessing for a Woman BeComing a Mama
It is a holy and beautiful experience bearing witness to women as they grow into new expressions of themselves. When a woman is pregnant she is not only birthing a child but rebirthing herself.
Rites of passage~are practiced to mark the transition from one phase of life to another. It is essentially a death and a rebirth as she is embodying the Divine Mother.
These ancient traditions honor the spiritual nature of life, while deepening our acceptance and understanding and celebrating our humanity. The art of ceremony anchors and supports a woman to psychological prepare to take her place in her new role, supported by her family and community.
Women gathering together brings enormous healing. When I facilitate an initiatory ceremony for a woman it is medicine for the Mama, Me and the Community. Tears flow for the Mother in me who felt completely unsupported in birth and I grieve on behalf of my matriarchal lineage. While simultaneously filling me with excitement and joy that we are finally here now. I use my experience as fuel to my fire, to stay true to the needs of our women, men and children. After thousands of years of patriarchy which forced our feminine rituals underground. This Mother to Be, is changing the entire dynamic of her lineage and the world.
The time returns!!! Here we are again, steeped in wisdom and remembering. Today I hold the red thread as a wisdom carrier of my lineage. I pass on Rites of Passage to empower women to celebrate their holiness. My silent prayer is that they will pass on this very grace to the next generation, friends and communities.
Thank you Mama Sarah for bringing me in, I am so honored to have witnessed your beauty I bow!
Thank you Irma, Cris and Andrea for being part of my remembering.
Photographer, Ina Schnyder
Holy Mother Sharing
Yesterday I went to the naked spa again, which brings up so much emotion around being seen, how I have not seen myself and ancestral and societal conditioning around our beautiful shapes and forms. How I have hidden my own beauty from men (having sex in the dark). Hiding from my own child, covering up instead of letting him see his mamas body. And mostly from myself, not really enjoying her.
And it disgusts me to have done this to myself! And this is part of where the shame thickens, I betrayed myself. Because I know the truth, I am exquisite just like every other body roaming this earth. It enrages me that we live in a world that women are taught to loathe their bodies with the implied message of (YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH) .
Normally at the spa, I have to take a deep breath and literally will myself to take off my clothes. This time, not so much! . What I experienced yesterday amidst the 100s of naked female bodies, was the deep presence of my Mother body. When you see my naked marked up body – you know, I am the Mother.
As I rose out of the water, breasts sagging with huge areola thanks to pregnancy, belly chubs doing its thing, was this sense of loving awareness. I am marked as the Holy instrument of the Mother. I didn’t see any women with stretch marks yesterday it was though mine were the highlight of the room. And I felt strength in this! Like these primal scars were a badge of holiness. I was proud of my body. I was proud to be Cody’s Mother and to own this power as a sacred gift. I broadcasted my soft Mother essence by embracing the gift imprinted on my body. This feeling brought me to tears took my breathe away.
Deep down I am still healing from the societal shame which I swallowed being a teenage Mother. I was cast out by family and some community because I chose a different path. Their ignorance wasn’t fully rooted in malice but fear because I chose a path less trotted.
Unkind Words spoken attribute to my concept of Mother – body image and it still burns in my belly – “Your Father must be rolling over in his grave over this”. “What will the neighbors think” – What kind of Mother will you be – What kind of life will you be able to give to this child? Uneducated – Incapable – Alone – No Money -Selfish – You can’t take care of yourself, how will you care for a child. #Trash #BadMother#Notenough #Faliure CANCEL!
But fuck that . I knew this was HER calling for me and so I armored up, while giving myself to the Mother with hope of being a different kind of Mother. And I was definitely a different kind of Mother.
Being a Mother in this society has been so challenging for our female species. The guilt, never being good enough, never getting it right, being responsible seemingly for every outcome, sucks the very life out of our experience. (Thank God we are shifting this collectively) This is the Great Work!
Walking the path of the Mother has been incredibly painful for me and yet it is my gift to this world. As I deepen my healing, I have moments that I am euphoric with love and other moments where I am filled with rage. Jesus this vessel holds so much! I bow to the ancestors, our Mother’s that raised children through the 5,000 years of patriarchy. And I grieve for the Mother in me, but I choose to no longer feel sorry for her.
I use my strength to deepen my sense of purpose to support women in embodying the Mother, feeling supported, trusting their wisdom and finding ways to nourish themselves. Accessing all the things I didn’t have or didn’t know I had. While unapologetically raising our children however the fuck we choose too. Preparing them and liberating them from the shackles of patriarchy and raising them in a whole new yummy and hopefully conscious way that is filled with more joy.
Mothers endure! Their physical bodies are banged up, stretched out beyond recognition – there are sacrifices that are made to create life! Its a holy mess! Nothing goes how we want it too. This is the nature of life on earth! The more support we have the easier it is…
We are warriors, lovers, and portals of creation…I Bow again and again and vow to fully awaken and meet the gifts bestowed. In 25 years so much has changed in the realm of mothering and all things birthing. We are making progress even though I wish it would come faster. But it is happening! I birthed more gently than my Mother and with each generation new consciousness is born and things change. We are the ones we have been waiting for. This body image reflection morphed into a deeper message, one I carry in my bones. #Freedom
#Selflove #Messymothering #Goddesslives #MarkedCreator #Holyvessel#HOLYHIGHPRIESTESS
CALLING ALL WOMEN IN! – MEN!!, Born of women who have Mamas, Wives, Daughters and Sons, this is equally for you! We all need THIS awareness so that we can help bridge the gap and heal the generational pain stored in Women’s bodies.
This post is NOT to EVER debate or even discuss (don’t bring it) right and wrong on life and death. I am not the one! 🙂 – I AM clear, your body and YOUR choice-PERIOD! So this is devoted to women and men who have experienced abortion or miscarriage. I am going to share some spiritual back ground in hopes of bringing awareness (light into the darkness) so that we can begin to understand, heal and even flourish from our experiences.
Just because it takes less then 30 minutes to have an abortion, and women often go back to work the next day, doesn’t mean its healthy. Our society is evolving but lets be clear it has never been sustainable for woman. Our culture leads women away from themselves. Through compassion and awareness, we are returning.
It is so important that women/couples fully acknowledge loss, so that new life can emerge. From the moment of conception your body/soul begin to shift into the primal intelligence of the Mother. When we terminate a pregnancy or miscarry without full acknowledgment (time to be with it and feel it) a distortion forms and we psychologically become confused. Part of us has moved on while the other part is still connected to the soul as a Mother. Now this is to your soul as a mother, as well as the soul who is incarnating. There is a loss unrealized.
The psyche fragments and we begin to numb and or disassociate from our feminine maternal nature and our bodies often shut down, and armor up to hide the pain! We then simultaneously inherit shame and guilt while we silently grieve. This causes soul loss, disconnection and leads to more loss, and illness. This is why so many women have multiple abortions and miscarriages. We didn’t just get sloppy! There is a much deeper soul mechanism playing out in the creation. The soul re-capitulates the event – if it is not addressed in a loving and holistic manner the first time around, we may get to replay it again and again. This is heart breaking!
There may likely be a lineage piece too, something seeking healing in your Mother line. What ever was not healed in the WOMEN who came before you, may be brought through you. These wombs are soul homes, portals of life and death and they should be revered as such. Its time to awaken and understand the sanctity of our bodies, souls, and our capacity as creators. We cannot leave our souls in the hands of our current medical system, we must seek our own council and return to our body wisdom.
HOW CAN EMOTIONAL AND PHYSICAL LOSS IMPACT MY LIFE AS A WOMAN?
BUT DON’T FREAK OUT, TRUST! WE WILL GROW AND LEARN FROM THE EXPERIENCE
WHAT CAN I DO ABOUT THIS NOW?
I AM A SOUL DOULA AND I OFFER SESSIONS TO SUPPORT WOMEN –
WHY? BECAUSE WOMEN NEED SUPPORT! ❤ . http://www.jacquelinerolandelli.com
I was 16 when I had my first abortion and my grief was intense. For one year I longed and suffered and my body shut down. NO MORE INTERNAL ORGASMS! I became pregnant purposely a year later and had the child (yay Cody!). I had another abortion a few years later and was so GRATEFUL to have the option to terminate, that I didn’t deal with it. These events changed my life.
There was a great deal of child loss in my lineage through miscarriage. Devastation handed down the line, womb by womb. More on this in my next article.
About a month ago I did a ceremony to honor all the losses in my lineage. I was fortunate enough to do this with my Mother. Many souls were with us and so much room has been made.
To be clear I am VERY aware that abortions and miscarriages are different experiences, but I am addressing both in one place. Where it all takes place in our female psyche and in our wombs. The cycle of life and death is the same but the experience is not.
Women need love! Women need compassion! WOMEN NEED SUPPORT! It is time to create a sustainable infrastructure that supports life. YOUR LIFE! Not just the babies you carry!
Is this mine? This is a potent question that most empaths and spirited folks really need to reflect on. It has come to my attention, yet AGAIN 🙂 because sometimes it takes me a while, 🙂 the illusion is real and I sometimes forget the basics, as I graduate into other areas of magic and expanded awareness. But the grounded and simple steps are golden and so I anchor this here now, and invite you to consider this as well – WE MUST ALWAYS RETURN TO THIS QUESTION. Is this mine?
In this reflection I want to talk about Ancestral imprints, and how to hone in on what is coming in or up for resolve and what we have the ability to do about it. What is mine? What is collective? As we touch base on what we refer to as collective, and how the martyr archetype is persistent Ugh I lovingly had a burial for mine this morning.
So thanks to my own inner process I have come to a place where there is no where to turn, but to learn a new way of navigating and my life literally depends on it. Life wants to live! (we will keep learning new ways because we are always evolving) So here we go!
Disclaimer: This piece is written in my understanding in this moment and it will likely evolve. So implement what feels true for you. I am not your Mother! 🙂 This statement alone is a song of liberation. Freedom is a choice!
Many of us, who are living our daily lives have forgotten that we are also connected through a lineage of lives. In our humanity we somehow have come to believe everything is about us, but in actuality our existence has everything to do with the WE that we come from. Womb by womb souls birth through the Mother before them and embody programs/beliefs, trauma, emotions, character traits, mannerisms and so on. We even birth ancestral protection mechanisms. We did this purposely in choosing our parents. We generally receive far less from the paternal lineage and of course we do pick up a slew of goodies from our environment. There is a great deal of unraveling to get to know our own intrinsic value. The threshold has been crossed. This year is the year we show up like never before. At the end of 2017, I received some downloads/knowings whatever you call them. ❤ I saw clouds of illusion/global karmic imprints turning into water, and dissolving. My personal karma has and is in the process of lifting in ways I had prayed for all my life. Can I get an amen! This is real deal! Hence another move is at hand. I am seeing it in clients, and in the stratosphere itself, when I use my witch eyes. 🙂
As we continue to soften into the sweet and nourishing embrace of the Divine Mother and Father, which is infusing all of those who are in a state of allowing. We are ultimately releasing the depths of soul deprivation – lack of nourishment which has intrinsically been handed down through what we know as the shitty patriarchy.
For many of us (my hand is raised high) we have been journeying through time, like diligent explorers in consciousness seeking resolve. In this deep devotional state of fulfilling our missions, (often confused with dharma) we have sought out that which is unconscious to shed more light on who we are, why we are here, and where we are going. Being in the flow and showing up when required. This is the path of the soul to find its way to the place we know as home. Continuously birthing itself an dying simultaneously. Full on!
We all know the only way out is in. So many of us on the planet got really busy going in. This was absolutely necessary. We went deep womb/soul diving and some of us never came out. In many ways I feel the experiment went to far. Now we need to learn we don’t have to take on the problems of the world. We are free to live!
We went through hologram after hologram and barrels of trauma and turned over every possibility to explore endless threads because we were so desperate to release all our suppression and sought not only relief from these imprints, but FUCKING JUSTICE with the hope that the next generations WILL NOT HAVE TO EXPERIENCE THIS! This is karma 😉 Day after day I was aware of more toxic threads or old stories seeking me, or was I actually seeking them? I absolutely love exploring Spirit/shadow lands. I am a scorpio and I’m like a female Goddess MacGyver! This world became much more intriguing than my human life and I am now making my way back to a more balanced existence. This was my soul path, no apologies! I move into deeper acceptance daily. There were huge shifts and I have grown exponentially and on most days I am grateful. Then there is the awareness that most of what I believed was mine, was not mine and I have spent a great portion of my precious life on a karmic mission. Martyring was much more dynamic. 🙂 This is not to make fun of myself or anyone experiencing this because it is part of the experience. Really I could lament my whole life, but wait, I already have. 🙂 This is what wants to shift for me personally. We all have our own process. In this next phase I am going to embody the celebration archetype. Dance Bitch Dance! hehe ❤
This was part of my learning and is so, for many of us. It is also training! My deepest learning was held in the archetype of the Mother (which I have felt since my adolescence which also became teenage motherhood for me) and the martyr has been her theme. I have felt responsible for every lost soul and it is exhausting to play Goddess in this way! Retiring! 🙂 I feel its an important message FOR ALL that we take hold of the opportunities provided to us at this time. That means if this message resonates for you, YOU could be done with so much of the relentless spiritual work you felt so devoted to doing before, which will create more room for you to step into your true capacity as a CREATOR. Ahhhhh Exhale!
This is NOT an invitation to walk away from your calling but to let go of the way your perceive it and get connected to an even deeper calling. I feel clear this is a juicy acceleration process that we are all being gifted. Remember the longer we hold on to shit, the longer our lineage has to hold onto it. We are the true birthers of our lineage and we need to take care. (feeling my sweet swami)
HERE GOES! Ancestral/Societal imprinting – So as psychic people information streams through us with emotion to be released. Instead of assuming its yours and diving in which can be habitual. I invite you to take a deep breath and just let it move and see what it requires. It may ask you to commune with it as you may see imagery or just get a knowing. I want you to remember to ask: Is this mine? This may take practice but it will come. You are writing the script, remember that. Once you get a read on the information which generally happens through inquiry. Spirit show me what I need to see for my highest good!.. thank you.. We can do this in several ways but really check in what is most aligned for you in the moment.
*Sometimes we can simply transmute it. I used to jump to this option because I was afraid of giving it back. Will the other person be able to handle it? Will they still love me? Will they actually physically die? Somehow eating other peoples garbage felt so natural and let me tell you, THERE IS NOTHING LOVING ABOUT HARMING YOURSELF AT THE EXPENSE OF ANOTHER. (Mother Wound) Forfeiting your life is cruel and never a good idea. I am still learning this lesson fully and I suspect we all are deepening our awareness of this.
*What ever you took on simply give it back! Its never too late to give it back and allow the other person to take full responsibility and learn their karmic lesson. Also its a way of taking up space and claiming your life as a priority. I found when I gave back some of the pain I was carrying for family, this was well received. At the soul level we are much more agile and aware. And if by slim chance the person stops loving you, guess what ❤ Its a miraculous blessing that you will be free of them. Sometimes this actually happens so you can learn and there is no mistake. Its all good!
*HERE IS SOME MORE IMPORTANT MEDICINE: You are super powerful and have access to EVERYTHING in creation. What we are aware of we can utilize. I feel we need to reflect on the under currents of our vocation and service as there is a major overhaul coming through to purify the ways in which we have held our bridges, and found false value in identifying ourselves with what we do, instead of who we are. We are wonderful and the game is changing! There are fields of ancestral consciousness and collective consciousness which you/I – are/have moving through us. When you become more aware that you want to honor your own life and your soul is re-educated and understands that it has the capacity to release it, it will! Awareness is everything! Invoke this now! The medicine is acknowledging your capacity and knowing you can ask this to be done. Thy will be done!
Set intention to release everything that no longer serves you and everything that doesn’t belong to you. Be clear that you are choosing to hand over everything that you carry for your ancestors and the collective to be dissolved. This may not be a quick fix but it is life affirming and the results my clients experience are out of this world. I know we are on the brink of massive freedom. Sit in your power and command with your awareness to have Spirit take what you are offering and give thanks. We all perceive this in different ways.
You can free up vows and contracts and you can further liberate. We have really taken things too far! Again, everybody does need to be accountable and do their own work. But lets work smarter! I have had ancestors say to me, why did you take this on? I could only sigh in disbelief. Why did I? But the answers for us all will come. We have really been f@cked with in many ways but its still all in Divine order. We are in process! Let’s keep allowing new teachings to come through while staying fluid and open to more efficient and faster ways to release 🙂 Here are some hooks to look out for:
Wishing us all more joy and soul liberation, Over and out! Love, Jacqueline http://www.themysticfeminine.com I am totally happy to work this through with you in a private session so that you can be empowered to fully access this full potential in consciousness. Its a magic show! And that’s how I role 🙂 www.themystifeminine.com (Women’s Circle in Gozo being held on March 10th.)
I am a woman! My body is strong, round & sweet. I am coming out of the closet with all my imperfections to settle up with Goddess and level up with self. I have secretly loathed my body since I can remember and I am over that sh@t. I am loving up on her now. We are in the midst of finding our way back to one another. This journey is deep and It runs through generations of women who have hated their bodies. My body is juicy & alive and is brimming with love. She is thick and has lots of extras all around. She is curvy, scarred and marked. She is made in the image of my foremothers and I am trying to find my way back to accepting the fullness of her. I look around and see a world telling me I am never enough, and that I am too much all at once. Which is it bitches? Recently I realized that my saggy breasts, round tiger stripped stretched out mother belly and jelly like thick wide hips & thighs look just like the ancient Mothers which I deeply revere. Blind spot? I bow to them and see their resplendent beauty and yet I have not honored my own beauty. Mirror Mirror on the wall, THIS is the great fall!!
After this deep epiphany, a doorway revealed and it was filled with love & tears. I felt all the ways I denied myself kindness and how I whipped myself for not being beautiful. My feelings towards my body were projections of a violent world that is blind to beauty and I am no longer choosing to participate. The photos of Venus have changed over time and it appears she has been put on a diet. This world will take everything from you, if you allow it. I would like the inner patriarch to be taken away too, but it appears I have to meet with that guy daily. I have to remind him that I am beautiful. Sometimes it takes convincing, but love is much more persistent. Luckily the Mothers have my back!
Recently as an act of self love I did a naked photo shoot. My soul sister/talented photographer Gosia Sachryn was the witness to my nakedness. The session was so tender, and well incredibly NAKED! I was deeply seen and it felt so loving to allow someone in, to really see me. I was soft like honey & wild like fire. I met so many aspects of myself that day and the photos captured them all. It was my maiden that really wanted my attention most and there was some deep healing between her and the Mother within me. At one point Gosia asked me, “tell me what it feels like to be a Mother”. With my hands on my belly and with full acceptance, I began to cry. Something so loving happened inside my soul that day and it is still unfurling. I was the Magdalene & the Mother all in one and I was beautiful! This is my sweet belly! It is also my son’s first home. I was 17 years old when we shared a soul for 8 months and he was a resident here. The sun rarely kisses this belly as she has been covered in a pile of shame for far too long. I am cleaning house! I am feeling like the world needs more woman revealing their true beauty and I am a lady who likes to show up! This body is precious and so is the woman who dwells in it. I continue to be in awe of love and how it finds its way through cracks and corners when we aren’t looking. It is time to let go of the stories that have been handed down to us and write new ones. No more hiding! In my story I am lovable, brave & wild. I affirm, I AM SHE! THE CREATOR OF LIFE, MADE IN THE IMAGE OF MY MOTHER!
In gratitude, ❤
All bodies are unique and beautiful. I am invoking a campaign of liberation. Free the belly! ❤ More on this soon!
I find myself in a massive rooting of cosmic power. The process is sometimes harsh. As the container anchors down and solidifies, there is a re-memberance of deep rooted fear of even more ant-life energy and it must be uncloaked. Navigating with tenderness and bold action takes a trusty hand especially as it is so visceral in my body. The mechanisms have devolved but they are still crafty and the interference really asks me to step up my level of discernment and use my tools to trust that I am supported and safe.
It started with a deep inquiry as to why my work is still not as full as I would like for it to be. Within moments I was met by the violence of an energy as it covered my throat and chest and came up through my spine. I got my answer! And another opportunity to get off my knees and BE WHO I AM! How easily we forget when the illusion taps into the mouth of the wound. So I know as difficult as this is we are ready to take this to the next level. I choose life Bitches! 🙂 I wanted to get feeble and take more time to grieve the losses and that is but another part of the loop. It seeks to immobilize! It is relentless but it cannot stand in the face of truth. So I showed up this time, I didn’t go into the weepy song and dance or the battlefield. I held my heart, packed my things and traveled 3 hours to facilitate my women circle. And it rocked my world and my heart is full!
It got me to thinking about a few years ago when I went to convene with the Black Mother of Montserrat, Spain. I had been there before but this time was different. As I went to kneel before the Mother, She said in a deep voice “GET OFF YOUR KNEES” my whole body shook and I let out a loud cry. I got off my knees and stood before her and poured my heart out.
I choose to stand as a Queen, and take my place in my lineage. Its time ❤