I walk this world in many shapes and forms. I am a shamanic shape shifting woman. There is a primal intelligence that lives within me (in all of us) and it reveals in a myriad of different forms which I call essence. Some parts I have come to know well, while others reveal themselves and come home to me when I need them. They are not outside of me and some have been with me since birth. Some of the animal spirits I walk with are ancestral spirits that have walked with my lineage protecting and caring for our family.
In my own life and in my work with women, I am fascinated by the psychology of our primal nature. As a scorpio I dive deep into darkness and light- primal and royal – All of the selves that walk within ONE. I seek to not only understand it, but to actually experience and embody it. I am in awe of the beauty, the rich texture that so lovingly offers itself to me, when I am willing to see and feel it. In truth, it is offered to us all.
I have come to learn who shows up when I am afraid and in need of protection. If I have been attacked and wounded energetically – vulture comes to bring me its medicine, breathes life back into me. When I need cuddles and support my dragon wraps itself around my heart and body. Some I walk with for a few months and they are rarely seen again. Some feel more like me, while others seem like family that leans in to help with specific initiations.
I have learned that different activities and physical places invoke different parts of the psyche. The intelligence is sublime. I have noticed aspects of myself that work together in tandem. For example my Dark feminine walks with the panther. The Mother in me walks as Bear. My Cosmic form flies as Priestess and shapeshifts with swan and vulture. All of the parts of the whole rest inside of my consciousness. I am everything and nothing and this is my nature always at play and always unfolding. I study particles, dna, soul and spirit, matter and the environment and how we relate to it. It spins me around in experience and offers me one thing – mystery. I don’t want to read about it from others, I want to live it! This is my way – then I will share it with others for them to experience it.
Often times we must switch up our rhythm to open the door to what we need. When I travel through different lands, all over the globe I am met with more parts of the self and more of me becomes known and whole. I have traveled far and wide to bring to life that which lives within this body. This was the deal and as arduous as it has been, it is my path to walk.
The Blackness of the panther and darkness within me came through today. I notice panther presents through movement (running and sex 🙂 While on the treadmill today picking up pace I began to feel the shift in my form. My body starts to pulse and heat rises, my legs become agile and my heart and chest lift upward while the lungs open to growl – vision shifts and I become animal.
As I run faster I can feel the masculine sensual pulse, black sleek fur on my body. I want to take up space and be free to let this beast sound off and come to life in me. We run through my psyche a dark and vast pathway, walls made of rock along the sides. Panther quickens and I feel this wildness undulating through my cells. I feel her there with him, this feminine darkness. I feel both male and female converge. He runs through the rocks and soil and to the stars collecting parts of my soul with his mouth. He brings them all back to me. They are parts that have been isolated or frozen in time. Together we bring them into consciousness again. We are made whole and enlivened.
The older I get and the more connected I am, the more I understand (on a good day) 🙂 the practicality of living a spiritual life. I am simply living my essence -using the ancestral wisdom and gifts that creator has blessed me with to support my journey on earth. Societal narratives suggest we disconnect from ourselves to strive to be something other than nature. We see this continues to harm us and our Earth Mother. In that ideology we are separated from our source and human beings are relational and therefore woven into one. My communing with Panther is felt physically and I have a deep love and respect for him. He is my ancestral familiar and comes from my Fathers line, yet he is me. 😉 My son also walks with Panther.
When we are open, we naturally access shamanic multidimensional flow states, the feeling of expanded awareness. Women were the first shamans – (a term adopted from Siberia) but now used globally to depict, for lack of a better word -medicine person. Archeological findings from all over the globe reveal real life figurines and carvings dating back thousands of years – (woman as bird – women as bull- women as boar) – women as shapeshifters, using shamanic practices to bring healing and guidance to her community.
Through the era of patriarchy we saw more men shamans and priests. The word changed forms and moved towards men and seemingly out of the realm of women. This is changing again as women are awakening and returning home to their power. We are living breathing medicine, that is in dire need on this planet to balance the polarity and do what we do best – birth a new world into being. Woohoo! We are taking up our space and place beside our brothers.
Through out herstory/history all of the Goddesses and Gods walked with animal spirits. They assist in healing, nurturing and walking us through our lives. We see Athena with the owl and Artemis with the deer. We see Shiva with the cobra and Sarasvati with her sacred swan. This has always been the way of human beings, as we never walk alone and these animal familiars are merely parts of us .
I am devoted to supporting women in remembering who they are and returning home to their gifts and power. When we cultivate relationships with our primal selves we dissolve conditioning and become attuned to creation. Stay tuned for 2020 offerings by joining my mailing list. http://www.ourfemininelegacy.com.